


Have you seen my...?

by Veraverorum (your_Mother)



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Bad Puns, Betaed, F/F, Femslash Friday, Genderbending, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-13
Updated: 2013-09-13
Packaged: 2017-12-26 11:51:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/965610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/your_Mother/pseuds/Veraverorum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are three kind of neighbours one can have: the kind elderly ones, the stuck up ones, and the foxy woman in short short skirts.</p><p>(now beta-ed)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Have you seen my...?

It happened not many days after Dwalin moved in her new flat.

She had met and greeted most of her neighbours while moving cardboard boxes along the path from her car to the apartment. Some were kind and offered her help – even though she was surely fitter and stronger than the half deaf old man of the second floor but oh joy, chivalry seemed to be still alive –, some just threw her side glances – the tall blonde from the attic won the golden medal in channelling disdain in a single gaze –, and other s she saw only out of the corner of her eye – there was someone who had a penchant for wearing really short skirts.

.

But back to the present, it happened not many days after Dwalin moved in her new flat.

She was trying to find the perfect place to store some of her books – yeah, big and muscular didn't mean she had no brain – when there was a curt knock at the door.

Not the doorbell ring from the main entrance of the building either, so it must have been one of her neighbours.

Dwalin opened the door, and she could finally put a face with the groin-length short skirts.

Truth to be told, there were also long legs clad in high leather boots, and a bust equipped with a nice pair of boobs between the miniskirt and the head, but the face was something spectacular.

She had long wavy hair in a red hue that would be hard to imitate, a fucking natural red head; she had captivating hazel eyes, sparkling from underneath long, red lashes. Her nose was straight and long, and it pointed down to a seductive mouth, angled in a provocative smile.

The foxy woman leant against the door frame like a predator on the prowl, her smile curving into a smirk while one of her long fingers played with a strand of soft looking hair.

“Hi... Have you seen my pussy?”

No, Dwalin couldn't believe it. The sexy woman was deranged. Just her luck to have a hot neighbour and discover right after meeting her that she was nuts.

She tried to force her brain to function again after the disappointment, “What?!”

“You know... a pussy. Red haired, fluffy, likes to get wet...”

At this, Dwalin dropped the books she was holding in her hands.

How could this woman talk about such arguments and look so unfazed? Not that Dwalin would be against it, if the chance were to be presented under different circumstances, but...

She bent on one knee to pick up again her books, but the purring, low voice of the woman questioned her, “So have you seen her?”  
Dwalin looked up at the question, and right in her line of vision she had the perfect view of those long legs, joining behind a layer of black-lace panties, red hair hiding behind that lace.

Yes she had seen her pussy… more or less.

She probably must have taken too much time to answer, in the woman's opinion, because the vixen kept talking, “She's so young and tiny and needy. And it's strange for a pussy to like to play with water so much, I fear she might have gotten in trouble.”

Dwaling could feel the other woman’s eyes fixed on her shaved head, accusing, obviously judging her for her depraved thoughts that she’d clearly read on her face.

“So. Have you seen my kitten?”

Dwalin dropped the books again for the shock.

Oh thrice damned..! She meant a cat!

Hastily, Dwalin picked up the books again and shot up.

Her face felt like a burning furnace, and the sight must have been something epic since the woman started sniggering.

“I haven't seen my pussy cat since yesterday, the little troublemaker, and since she's nowhere else in this building and you've had your door constantly open for the transfer, I thought she might be hiding in your house.”

The woman kept purring out her words, moving her painted lips in the most pornographic manner Dwalin had ever seen.

Still feeling embarrassment flowing through her, Dwalin let the redhead in her flat.

They searched around the house while talking – Dwalin felt really dumb for not introducing herself before letting the other come in – and finally found the little ball of red fur happily licking at the drops of water dripping from the faucet of the sink.

“Oh Nora, you little tramp!” Nori picked up the kitten in her hands and started cooing over her.  
Then Dwalin accompanied them to the door and said goodbye.

So Nori was the name of the hot neighbour on whom Dwalin would be fantasizing about in the following years.

Gods, she needed to get laid.

.

Two days later came another knock on the door.

Dwalin was in her most comfy attire, but her house was pristine perfect. Everything in its place and ready to receive guests.

She went to open the door.

“Hi. Do you want to see my pussy?” Nori greeted her, always purring predatorily on the threshold, always wearing those short skirts. 

“I've already seen your cat.” but Dwalin noticed the conspicuous absence of the kitten in the woman's hands.

“I'm not talking about my cat. I'm talking about the other one” she smirked, before pushing Dwalin out of the way to enter in her house.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know why this exists. But it's better than nothing XDDD


End file.
